Nothing But Daylight!

Boodini is like one of those deep issues of the heart like so many such, one can never forget, why would you let go of another living life memory, after all this world is nothing but heaven and hell. Who doesn't have a share in the good, bad and not so much. So we move forward, haunting, telling, silent wind blowing in the early morning dawn, and the beautiful blazing maud sunset, blasting the sky with celestrial stars.

II’m all alone in the rainfall

hear my name call

I look up but there's no one around

The sky is wild and the wind blows

I'm out my window

Trying to fly but I keep falling down

I will never have that dream again

If I do I'll just get up and then

Sure as the sun will rise

I'll be there by your side

Till the end of time

I live my life, where it takes me

I'm what it makes me

I get up but I keep falling down

Keep falling down

The blinding light silhouettes me

I try to get free

So I run but I keep falling down

I will never have that dream again

If I do I'll just get up and then

Sure as the sun will rise

I'll be there by your side

Till the end of time

And every night I close my eyes

I hear the voices calling

Don't try to hide, don't try to fight

It's only sleep, it's just a dream

And you're not really falling

Get up and try to live your life

I live my life, where it takes me

I'm what it makes me

All Things Pass......

Looking Back Looking Forward Boodini

 Time has not flown by, and many circumstances have completely changed. It has been one year, an anniversary of major disruption to what was a journey. Boodini rests on the other side and I am here now. 

It had a been a year since our normal dog Sadie left us, and I had a flyer that a person gave me cause they said I needed a running partner, a dog. After an agreement from the home front, I sent the adoption papers in.  As we sat in the living room going through the prelims, I set the gatorade bottle half filled with kibble and watched as Boodini pawed it over and ate the spilled food. I never felt fear although this was a lethal combination for her and anyone that wanted to get near her possessions. Days before leaving for Hardrock in Colorado, the better half told me that I should know that I couldn't keep this dog. I never spoke a word, and I thought once I hit the road it would all figure itself out. And so it goes. This would prove to be no Normal Dog or a Normal Journey.

Crossing the Rainbow Bridge

On Sunday October 20th 2019, Boodini passed peacefully and left her loved ones to a much more enriching afterlife. As a pup she went through the Katrina hurricane and was rescued in New Orleans,    to Mississippi and finally to Austin via the Lee Mannix Canine Center. About one year old I adopted her with many behavior disorders which were difficult to manage. She was obedient in commands, a good agility athlete, a great search and rescue worker. She won first in a few 5K runs in her good years. Toward her final years in was heartbreaking to watch her abilities diminish. None the less she was a survivor and would not ever give up.
 In what seems like too short of a life of 15 years, she was a loyal companion, with unconditional love. The time however does come as much as we would like to to deny, we must make the selfless decision to give back to our precious loved one that they may have freedom and dignity. Everyday, in every way  Boodini will be so very much missed.

A Song Writer

I can take the rain of this empty house, that doesn’t bother me. I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out. I’m not afraid to cry once in awhile. Even though going on with you gone still upsets me. There are days every now and again I pretend I’m okay, but that’s not what gets me.

What hurts the most, was being so close… and having so much to say and watching you walk away, and never knowing what could have been, and not seeing that love in you is what I was trying to do…..

It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go. It’s hard to force that smile when I see old friends and I’m alone. Still harder getting up, getting dressed, living with regret. But I know if I could do it over I would trade, give away all the words that I saved in my heart that I left unspoken.

 What hurts the most was being so close…..

The Next Right Thing

  In a series of conversations I was once again assured that we think firmly about something and we actually begin or do believe it to be true. For the most part the world is very divisive these days probably for this very reason. Once in awhile someone walks our path and they are very different. The persona they carry is glowing with admirable character, and this is developed, nurtured, practiced, after all they worked on it till it became a habit. Most will say or remember them by the fact that they were so kind, or loving to all, or any of a number of great qualities. This person is a magnet, people want to be in their company. Unfortunately  most of us believe in the lie, you know, "I'm not that good, how can I possibly reach that level of existence", etc. We all begin to accept the defeat, we stop persevering, we become despondent, we end up taking so much less. We develop nothing, we are just plain lazy, we won't or practice anything. We end up with those results, then we let everyone know what a shit hole life is. So you attract nothing, you give nothing, you just take. Look into the lives of these special few, learn to dial back the lie and live the real dream about yourself, and it will be work. Expect zero in return.

Halfback Get Off Your Dead Ass!

  Unfortunately as hard as it is to diet, exercise and just basically take better care of ourselves it usually gets combined with a nagging lack of motivation or goal orientated focus. Actually most of the population quite contrarily does not, and are left with that result. At a high school reunion it was shocking to see classmates who were pillars of athleticism now becoming grossly obese, body parts not functioning in a forward motion process, and obviously a health disaster. Passing the years I am not sure why I have been able to still knock off marathons, walk miles everyday, and be injury free. So if getting off our dead asses and performing some type of progress in spite of the lack of desire or initiative can still be overcome it definitely needs to continue. Or else, all of us will end up in the Doc's office, screaming about health care or the lack of and unable to go for that soda and chips which we so love to consume as we watch our Reality show rerun after rerun.

What To Do on The Way

   Day by day, hour by hour, man builds the character that will determine his place and standing among his associates throughout the ages. … More important than riches, more enduring than fame, more precious than happiness is the possession of a noble character. Truly it has been said that the grand aim of man’s creation is the development of a grand character, and grand character is by its very nature the product of a probationary discipline.

  There is another responsibility correlated and even coexistent with … agency, which is too infrequently emphasized, and that is the effect not only of a person’s actions, but also of his thoughts. Man radiates what he is, and that radiation affects to a greater or less[er] degree every person who comes within that radiation. Sickness may waste the body, but the true life is the spirit within, that which thinks and feels and loves and suffers and wills and chooses, aspires, and achieves. The purpose in life is to beautify, ornament, develop that something within. To develop a more radiant and lovely character is the true purpose in life.
  It is glorious when you can lie down at night with a clear conscience, knowing you have done your best not to offend anyone and have injured no man. You have tried to cleanse your heart, and if you put forth precious effort, you can sense, the realization that you have made the world better for having been in it.