Hello!!!! is Anyone There???

Dear Board Members:
   I hardly respond to our email list, ok that's right I don't ever. I realize you are probably in a closed door important meeting and cannot be disturbed, ok maybe you actually have a life and don't just sit around waiting to answer incoming emails like a few of our members who expound on their vast experiences which include anything and everything on the planet. But thank you for the free email address, even though lately it has us rebooting because of the notices telling us of our bouncing emails? There has been lots of discussion. After the Community run, that's the new name for races that cost $100 no matter what the distance, lots of members were ready to form a posse and become vigilantes to snuff out someone who had their music serenading wild life, and gravely ruining the sounds of breaking wind and hard breathing from running trails, whether in shape or not. It makes it hard to just concentrate on the pain with all that loud music, so as you can see members were upset, and some thought you should do something about it! Then of course the member who wants to come off as a conscientious volunteer, who actually on the down low is a high paid employee of  a company that puts on "Community Activities", had to give us a list of courtesy checks. This is actually the list of any RD, wanting to make their enterprise easier if the runners followed their thoughts. Things like blowing your nose and then reaching for food with those same hands for aid station cuisine. Obviously loud music was on the list of how we all should behave, and then the long talk about how the world is no longer  a nice place and everyone is just plain selfish. So what else is new. I'm not sure, but I think they want you to send more free volunteers to attend to all these infractions. Most of all we had several "elites", or at least wannabes, who proposed that we were no different than them. We are all capable of carving out a faster, stronger runner, but we will have to work, that's right, and work hard! That way within a few years we burn out, quit running Community events, hate running altogether, as they seem to have done. It's been a great week of emails so far and
comedy relief is always there if you only look. Because in a world as pitiful as this, everyone should
be able to invent some sort of discussion and be thoroughly amused. Lastly I don't give advice, because I found out the shoes I really like are for  someone with polio and over pronate!
P.S. When are you ever going to give us that Free Pizza like I think you promised?